The War of the Sexes
by princesslilyx1x
Summary: A crazy, a wacko, a witch, and a wierdo. A hothead, an icecube, a lazyass, and a perverted loudmouth. Pranks, tricks, jokes, and surprises. This was going to get interesting. SxS NxH SxI NxT story better than summary! R&R! no flames plz.


Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto as much as I want to.  
Excuse my Japanese names because I am not Japanese, unfortunately…  
This is my first fanfiction and I hope you guys like it. R&R! No flames plz!  
The nicknames will be explained as the story goes on.

"Text" talking  
'_Text' thoughts  
_'_**Text' Inner **_

The War of the Sexes 

_August 30, 10:20 P.M. Friday _

**Sakura**

"Come on everyone! Sing it with me!" I shouted, while dancing, to the mesmerized crowd. As the song ended, I breathed a sigh of relief. Waving, blowing kisses, I received several bouquets and exited backstage. I slumped into a chair quite exhausted. "That was Esako Itagaki with her new hit single, 'Cherrylicious'!" I heard the announcer say with enthusiasm. "And don't forget to see her new show coming soon!" The crowd cheered and whistled. I smiled to myself for being able to entertain the crowd and end their night with another successful and, if I might add, a WONDERFUL concert. _'Well I certainly had a pretty fun night.' __**'CHYA! Totally!' **_The smile was still plastered on my face as I relived the scene just moments before. But this really isn't good enough for me… I need to beat my top competitor Sasuke Uchiha!

**Ino**

As the final contestant stepped off the stage, the lights dimmed. My heartbeat began to quicken even with the assurance of my past few victories. I had the urge to scream out to the world to hurry up with the announcing but I kept it to myself. "And the winner is…" _'Drumroll please!' _I imagined the rhythmic beating of the percussion instrument. _**'Of course your highness. Would you like a side dish of reality with that?' **__'You ALWAYS ruin the fun!' _"Akinomika Chizumi!" Relieved, I let out the carbon dioxide that was held in my mouth. _'Ugh! That took FOREVER!'__** 'Mhmmm…'**_ I slowly made my way up the stage with the best strut that I could manage without looking too perky or anything. This is a SCIENCE fair after all. You know? The supposedly "nerdy" place. _'Don't get me wrong! I love science and math and all that jazz!'__** 'Nerd…' **__'You're one too!' _After receiving my award and medal, and ladidadida, I jumped off the stage and exited the building as the applauding faded away and the audience was dismissed. Ok…so maybe I wasn't really content with that victory…you're asking me why? Well, because Shikamaru Nara was there to win a prize too!

**Tenten**

'_Hmm…how did I take a liking to sports again?' _I thought to myself as my feet pounded across the basketball court. I never really thought about why I liked sports…I think it was the excitement and competitions that lured me into the amazing world of sports. The adrenaline pumping through your body and the suspense at scoring the last goal always made me feel alive. No matter what the outcome was, win or lose, I was always happy with just being able to participate. _'Well just for the kicks of bragging, my "teams" never really lost before.' __**'Hello? They've got us!'**__ 'YOU, can't play sports for crap, while __I__ can. So you have no say in this.' __**'Che… you are illogically insulting yourself.' **__'Hmm…you're just annoyed that you can't beat me! HA!'_Yes I participate in almost every single sport known to man. Not only can I prove the sexists out there wrong, I also can beat the hell out of 'em! "BEEP!" the final bell sounded and _'of course' __**'Duh!**__' _WE WON! Cheering and patting each other on the backs, we grabbed our belongings and left the gym. "That girl, Tenakimi Shimoku, is amazing at sports!" I heard one of my fans say to another. And I just chuckled at their comments. Only…that chuckle didn't last long after hearing one of my arch rival's fan cheer Neji Hyuuga on. I mean I know that he's Hinata's cousin and all but he ain't getting sympathy from me!

**Hinata**

I twiddled my fingers as I waited for the anticipated announcement. "And the winner for the Newberry Award is….Hinami Mokomura!" Silently screaming to myself and spazzing out inside, I made sure I looked presentable and slowly made my way to the stage. Staggering a bit along the way, I caught myself just in time and stepped onstage. People around me cheered and shouted. Many people came to get my autograph for my new book "Trends and Friends". It's basically about dealing with everyday highschool life with tips on well…Trends and friends. Haha! _'Cheers to my fans! And myself!' __**'And to me! Whoot!' **_I mentally noted to call Sakura, Ino, and Tenten after I get home to celebrate. Yes, they are my BFF's who I could NEVER live without! I mean everyone has one right? Well…at least _one_? Hehe… I mean Naruto-kun does too! _**'Sometimes I wonder how I got stuck with you…' **__'Hey! What'd you mean by that!?'__** 'Ohhhh nothing.'**_

* * *

**Character Profiles(Girls)**

Name: Sakura Haruno-the voice

Appearance: Bubble-gum pink hair, sea green eyes

Birthday: March 27

Age: 15

Nicknames: Saki, Cherry, Princess; from the guys: crazy

Personality: A perfect princess

Status: leader of the ruling girl group, 4.0 G.P.A., School Vice President, Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes, best actress/singer/dancer, heiress to the worldwide famous Haruno Corps.

Occupation: Famous singer, actress, model, dancer known as Esako Itagaki or Cherry Princess; Student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Aries

Likes: anything sweet, coffee, music, fashion, acting, pink, technology, pranking the guys

Dislikes: icecube bastards, fangirls

* * *

Name: Ino Yamanaka-the brains

Appearance: long blonde hair, icy blue eyes

Birthday: September 23

Age: 15

Nicknames: Ino-pig, Mika, Akino; from the guys: weirdo

Personality: A flirtatious fashionista

Status: 4.0 G.P.A., Yearbook Comittee, Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes, Newspaper Gossip column, Heiress to her mother's famous line of fashion

Occupation: Smartest girl in the world known as Akinomika Chizumi; Student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Libra

Likes: anything girly, shopping, fashion, magazines, school **(****who would've known?****),** purple,

technology, pranking the guys, gossip

Dislikes: ugly things **(Hmm…what would that be?)**, lazyass jerks, fangirls

* * *

Name: Tenten Ama-the strength

Appearance: chocolate brown hair, brown eyes

Birthday: March 9

Nicknames: Tennie, Tena, Kimi; from the guys: whomper

Personality: A spunkalicious sport-lover

Status: 4.0 G.P.A., Vice captain of all sports, Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes, plans all Sports events, Heiress to her father's famous sports school

Occupation: Famous and best girl athlete known as Tenakimi Shimoku; Student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Pisces

Likes: sharp things, competition between friends or peers, sports, technology, pranking the guys

Dislikes: arrogant hotheads, fangirls

* * *

Name: Hinata Hyuuga-the words

Appearance: lavender bluish hair, lavender eyes

Birthday: December 27 **(might I add that my bday is on THE SAME day!)**

Nicknames: Hina, Nami, Momoka; from the guys: wacko

Personality: An achieving artist

Status: 4.0 G.P.A., artist for school play backgrounds, etc., Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes, Newspaper editor, yearbook committee, becoming more famous like her artist parents

Occupation: Famous Artist(writing and drawing) known as Hinami Mokomura; Student

attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Capricorn

Likes: reading, a certain blonde headed blue eyed loudmouth, drawing, hanging out with friends, technology, pranking the guys, writing

Dislikes: people who are mean to her friends, fangirls

**Character Profiles(Guys)**

Name: Sasuke Uchiha

Appearance: raven/ebony hair with dark blue streaks, onyx eyes

Birthday: July 23

Nicknames from the girls: chicken butt, icecube bastard

Personality: isolated from the world except from his best friends

Status: leader of ruling male group, 4.0 G.P.A., President of school, Honor Roll Student, All honors classes, best actor/singer/dancer, Heir to famous worldwide Uchiha Corps

Occupation: Famous singer, actor, model, dancer; Student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Leo

Likes: tomatoes, a challenge

Dislikes: fangirls, sweet things

* * *

Name: Shikamaru Nara

Appearance: dark brown hair, brown eyes

Birthday: September 22

Nicknames from the girls: pineapple head, lazyass jerk

Personality: lazy and finds everything "troublesome"

Status: 4.0 G.P.A., Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes

Occupation: Smartest guy in the world; Student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Virgo

Likes: cloud watching, peace and quietness, sleeping and napping

Dislikes: loud noises, fangirls

* * *

Name: Neji Hyuuga

Appearance: chocolate brown hair, lavender eyes

Birthday: July 3

Nicknames from the girls: mudilocks, arrogant hothead

Personality: Gets too competitive sometimes and gets angry easily

Status: 4.0 G.P.A., Captain of all sports teams, Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes, plans sports events

Occupation: Famous and best guy athlete; Student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Cancer

Likes: sports, being the best

Dislikes: being beaten, fangirls

* * *

Name: Naruto Uzumaki

Appearance: blonde hair, blue eyes

Birthday: October 10

Nicknames from the girls: dumb blonde, perverted loudmouth

Personality: Very clueless and thick headed

Status: 4.0 G.P.A., Honor Roll Student, All Honors classes**(Who knew he had the potential?)**

Occupation: -none-; student attending Konoha High

Horoscope: Libra

Likes: ramen, ramen, ramen, ramen, and Hinata

Dislikes: not getting ramen, being bored

**

* * *

**

Intro

They were two perfect groups of perfect people who look amazingly perfect together. So what was the problem? Well…they're rivals. It all started out that fateful summer before all of them entered Konoha High. The girls had been best friends, like sisters, since forever and same went for the guys but of course they were like brothers. And all was well until they met each other at Camp Konohagakure. Everyone knows that summer camp is supposed to be all about fun and relaxation but not for the two groups. For them it was fierce competition, wicked schemes, and many, MANY sneaky and hilarious pranks. The girls, kept their secret identities while the guys, with their exposed identities, earned fast points from the insane fangirls including Karin, Temari, Suzume, and Tayuya.

A crazy, a wacko, a witch, and a weirdo. A hothead, an icecube, a lazyass, and a perverted loudmouth. Follow them on a rollercoaster full of tricks, jokes, and surprises. It's not Halloween yet nor is it April Fools but you gotta have fun once in a while right?

_

* * *

_

August 30, 10:40 P.M. Friday

**Sakura**

So as Sasuke Uchiha's top rival, I am determined to beat him in any way possible. Like in the upcoming concert which we will compete at! I, for one, have my master plan. HA Uchiha! HA! In your face!! Hehe ya I tend to go overboard sometimes…ignore my sudden outbursts. -smiles- But the concert…isn't really…gonna support my umm…how should I word it? Innocent image. Why? Because it is explicit, it's seductive, and it's the sexiest yet dirtiest thing the world's ever gonna see. _'It's the sudden change of directors.'__** 'No kidding…just look at him.'**__ I_ reasoned to myself. _'And, it's to show off what I've got and beat Uchiha! Cha! Now that's a bargain!'__**'Totally!' **_At first I had said, "I simply won't do it! At least not in front of a bunch of hormonal teenage boys and perverted old men!" That triggered Jairaya's lecture button. He stormed into the room and calmly lectured me on the life of a teenage actress/singer/model. "Esako, Esako, my cherry pie, apple of my eye, darling-ly gorgeous, beautiful princess. You're hot, you're sexy! Share it with the world for God's sake!" He threw his hands up dramatically. I cringe at the comment. _'WTF? I don't even believe in god! Well actually I do believe in Kami but whatever! And it's absolutely vulgar sounding since it came from an old perverted geezer like him…' __**'Heh, but you gotta agree that WE are Smokin hot! Burn sizzle sizzle!' **__'uh…ya…you can go die in a hole now!' 'Ok…if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna need support' __**'Heh, yah like backup dancers and stuff!'**_And THAT was when an idea hit me. I grin deviously. I laugh my evil laugh. MUHAHAHAHA! _'I am dragging Ino-pig, Hina, and Tennie in with me whatever it takes!'__**'Do your thang girlfriend!' **__'Umm…keep it real, or keep it quiet.' _So I tell Jairaya, "Fine, I will do it, but under one condition." I raise a finger and waited for an answer. "Hmph, fine, what's the condition?" He asked with a tint of disappointment in his voice. I almost felt bad but not quite. "I want my friends to be the backup dancers." I demanded with a stern voice. _'This had better work!' _I thought to myself. _**'I am now snickering at your stupidity.' **__'Stafoo! Like you're not stupid?'__**'FYI, I am NOT stupid! Only you are.' **__'you forgot one thing…' __**'What?' **__'You're part of me, I'm in charge of you! -punch-' __**'Ef!!'**_"But…but…but…they don't even know the dance and it's going to take a long time to learn! They won't learn it in time!" He whined like a child snapping me out of my thoughts. It was obvious that he wanted to follow through with his own plan. I closed my eyes and crossed my arms over my chest. "It's all or nothing." I told him. My voice was surprisingly cold. He glares at me but gives in. "Fine! But they better know the dance by the time of the concert!" He storms out of the room and I chuckle in satisfaction. Shuffling through my bag for my phone, I flipped it open and dialed Ino's number.

**Ino**

All is peaceful and quiet as I sit in my dazzling Porsche enjoying the song "The Best Damn Thing" by Avril Lavigne. But it got interrupted by…you got it, Sakura. My ringtone echoed through the night as I drove on. Picking it up, I used the most irritated voice I could without showing my sleepiness. "What Sakura what?" I calmy, but irritatedly, said to her. "Ino! I need your help!" She squealed into the phone. _'Whoa! No nickname! Must be a big one.' _"Wha-" I couldn't even finish my sentence before she turned this private convo into a conference. I didn't mind though because it was with Hina and Tennie. _**'Except for the part that we are undeniably tired!'**__'Oh shut up you! Just GTFO.' __**'Hmph! I'm not talking to you anymore!' **_"You guys! I need your help!" I heard Sakura say again. "So at my upcoming concert I need backup dancers…and like…well… you see…" I heard her stalling on the other end. "Just spit it out Sakura!" I half screamed half yawned. So she surrendered and told us. "Can you guys be my backup dancers?" She blurred all the words together but we all in some way understood and silently nodded. More silence. In desperation to prevent myself from sleeping, I squealed like a little child on Christmas. Flailing about, I finally stopped after earning a cough from Tenten. "It was a mucus!" She promised. _'Ya…a mucus… I sooo believe you since you've NEEEVER done THAT before in your life.'__** 'She deserves a slap for that!' **__'Thought you weren't talking to me? And also don't you effing dare biatch because she is my friend!'__** 'Whatever, do what you want, but you KNOW I'm right.'**_"So…it's a sleepover?" I asked with fake enthusiasm. "Heck ya!" Tenten screamed. _'I wonder where Hinata is…' __**'Being raped by Naruto?' **__'-punch- -slap- SUPER INO KICK!' _"So who's place should we go to?" Hinata suddenly spoke. "How 'bout mine?" Sakura offered. I mean SHE is the one that is asking us for help. "Kay! Be there in five!" I cheerfully added. We never need to bring anything to a sleepover at any of our houses so I sped down the road toward Saki's. Arriving, I realized that my sleepiness was completely lost and it was replaced with excitement. I was never the "best" at dancing but you know, I'm gonna burst Nara's bubble. Sakura's maid opened the door for me and swiftly put my shoes on the shoe rack while slipping a pair of slippers in front of my foot. Entering the mansion, I heard thudding on the elegant staircase. Sakura came running towards me with increasing speed. "Ino! You came!" She shouted into my ear following with a glomp. I winced. "Yea…I did…" My voice shook slightly. "Go upstairs and get changed, It's the purple one on the right." She told me and pushed me gently towards the stairs. I followed her instructions. Entering her room, it was as pink and princess-y as ever. Rainbows and hearts splattered all over her walls and stuffed animals lined the floor. Prancing like a princess toward her bed, I picked up the purple sports tank and shorts. Quickly changing, I stretched for a while to prepare for the dancing.

**Tenten**

As my phone rang, I knew I wasn't going to be able to sleep. With drooping eyelids and a comfy towel, I slid open my phone and greeted the three on the other end. "Wasup?" I asked. All I heard something about backup dancers and sleepover at Saki's before they all left. "Wait!" but I was too late. I could feel a headache coming up but I wouldn't miss a sleepover for anything. I ordered my driver to drop me off at Saki's. Wondering what we're gonna do, I relaxed a bit until the car came to a stop. "Thanks." I said as Keitaro opened the door for me. I lazily walked up to Sakura's door and rang the door bell. Rika(Sakura's maid) came to open the door. My shoes were replaced with red slippers and I happily ran inside. Sakura came out from the kitchen with some chips and she told me to go change. "Hey Tennie! Ino's already upstairs in her workout outfit. You should get changed too! Yours is the red one on the left." She ushered me to go upstairs. Running up the stairs I arrived at Sakura's room. Opening the door, I found Ino on the floor reading a magazine in her splits position. "Hey!" she waved. "Hey!" I waved back. Grabbing my outfit, I slipped into Sakura's bathroom and slipped on the red sports tank and shorts. _'Aww…Saki provided red ribbons for my hair.'_ And this is why I love my friends! They always know what I need. _**'Just tie your hair up! Jeez!' **__'Psh, what do you know?' _Tying my hair up into two Chinese styled buns, I skipped out of her bathroom and began stretching with Ino. We talked about the hilarious scenarios from camp and how we don't really want to see them again. Like I mean seriously, if we have to cope with their "I am superior" attitude, we'd rather pack our bags and move. And I REALLY REALLY hope we don't have to go to the same school! GAH! Ok so laughing along, I checked the clock. _'Hmm…Hinata should be here by now.'_ I predicted. Walking down the stairs, the bell rang right on cue. _'Whoa! Creepy!'_ I thought. _**'Heck ya…it's like she read your mind.' **_"I got it!" I called out to no one in particular. Sliding down the staircase handle and across the floor in my socks, I jumped as if I was on ice and opened the door gracefully after landing a perfect pirouette. Disaster struck as my blood boiled with hatred. Standing right in front of me wasn't just Hinata but her cousin as well. _'Neji! He's going down! Even though he is wearing that god damn delicious smirk!' __**'I want to eat joo Neji! Come closer!' **__'Just shut up…'__** 'You're telling yourself to shut up…' **_

**Hinata**

OK…so maybe I really wanted to go to sleep. Maybe I really wanted to rest in peace. Maybe I really wanted to relax just for a few minutes. But no…Kami didn't hear my call. It's not like I hate my friends for interrupting my nap, its just… _'ok…maybe I kinda am cranky for that but whatever! Saki needs help!' __**'Our sleep! Sleep!'**_ So I woke myself up and got Neji to drive me over. _'Please don't let Tenten see Neji! Please don't let Tenten see Neji!' __**'Hooo boy, will THAT be a disaster!' **_I prayed and prayed but you know how it is…today, Kami is just not hearing my calls. As Neji escorted me all the way to Sakura's front door, Tenten stepped out to greet me. And…she saw Neji. She scowled and Neji smirks which causes Tenten to scowl more. I was afraid now because this never turns out pretty. "What Tenten? Not happy to see me?" Neji acts offended but smirks as Tenten clenched her fists digging her nails into her skin. The shocker was, Tenten smiled. She smiled and pretended nothing happened then she let down her hair as to not show any care and hide the nail marks. Well that was just part of her plan. Flirtatiously she said, "Yea, of course I'm happy to see you _Nejiiii_." Drawing out the "i" sound, I could see her eyelashes batting. I shuddered. "So you finally came to your senses and realized that I was better than you?" Neji exclaimed in a falsely happy voice. Tenten smirks and waits for several minutes. Then she repeats, "Tooootally happy to see you Neji! You with your face punched in!" She screamed as she lunged towards him. She gritted her teeth and took her best shot. Missing his face because he dodged it, she made a quick comeback and went for his stomach, caught off guard, Tenten sent him flying. Neji's body thumped to the ground 5 feet away and he growled half in pain and half in anger. This time, he lunged at her. Pinning her to the ground, he demanded an apology. Sakura, being the "good friend" she is, heard the ruckus and came to stop it. Freezing in midstep as she saw the scene, she chuckled in amusement. "I see they're at it again." She said nonchalantly. "Apologize!" Neji whispered. "HELL NO!" you can hear Tenten screaming from 15 feet away. _**'You go girl!' **__'Oh shush you! I'm trying to figure a way to stop them!' __**'Well you sure are slow…' **__'Bleh!' _Still pinned to the ground, the strong willed girl didn't give up. Struggling and fighting back, she looked pretty sexy with her hair down. At least that's what Neji's expression told me. I can tell that Neji didn't really want to leave but being the good bodyguard cousin that he is, he let go of Tenten and reminded me to be safe and call him if anything happens. Waving, he took one last glance at Tenten and smirks… oh god why? Good thing Sakura knows Tenten well so before she could lunge for Neji again, Sakura stopped her. "Calm down Tennie! He's not worth it!" She calmly told her. I, myself, also walked up to her to calm her down. Soon we were laughing together as we stepped inside Saki's house. _'Whew…problem solved.' _


End file.
